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WOMEN: WE ARE AMAZING.


WOMEN: WE ARE AMAZING.

With blurred lines of society today, I write about my discovery of being a  woman. Although we are all born with it intrinsically, it is a art that can be crafted and refined with knowledge. Womanhood is something special and is a storehouse of amazing powers. However, most of us women do not acknowledge this great energy within us, firstly because we are ignorant about it and secondly because we are trapped in a society with numerous stereotypes, for instance, women can’t drive, women are not productive at work, women are weak, women talk a lot of nonsense, women are supposed to cook, women are supposed to understand their husbands and compromise or adjust. All of these external stigmas impede women from unleashing their true potential. But let me tell you one thing very frankly, being a woman is not about doing house chores, it is not about getting married and it is certainly not about producing children. A successful woman is one who can build a firm foundation with the bricks others have thrown at her.

I embrace being a woman. I embrace femininity. That does not mean pink, ruffles and flowers( I don't even like flowers). It means I am all woman both in speech and in deeds. I wasn't like that always though. I grew up as a First child and only daughter and was once very confused with masculine and feminine traits. While I was never a tomboy, I had some unconscious negative attitudes about being a woman. I was just rather uninformed about many things about being a woman. I was tough, harsh, and too strong willed, uptight and terribly blunt. I can look into your eyes, tell you whatever i want to say and go without thinking of the impact of such strong words. I had more of masculine traits than feminine. That wasn't what being a woman should be at all. However, with the help of books, Sisters fellowships, associating with women who have spent 10 and some twenty and more years in marriage, I learnt how to unlearn those masculine traits and embrace femininity.

You must know this, Womanhood is about having the qualities that are natural and characteristic of being a woman. Most girls grow up to adolescence with a mother, and those for who are extra blessed...have elder sisters to grow up with. The knowledge about being a woman gets passed down. However, for some other people, they may have grown up with an absentee mother, due to work, or were raised by fathers alone.Sometimes, these well-meaning mothers themselves were not shown the qualities of womanhood. Thus, have found themselves inadequate to teach. Overall, I feel that most women have these innate qualities - it just could be that these qualities may be supressed unknowingly just like mine was suppressed years ago.

Though it is natural, many times modern society does not value or applaud it, manipulating us to be in want. I believe there is a call right now to all women out there, to return to our feminine roots. When we become the finest woman, we draw out the real men.

In order to fight these conventions, we first need to sort out our internal doubts. In order for others to accept you, you first need to accept yourself. If you don’t love your self, if you don’t have confidence within you, if you are not sure about your goals in life; then the world will not love you, will not have confidence in you, and will always question you on your goals. It does not matter if you are tall or short or slim or fat, what matters is your ability to express yourself and your ideologies boldly. Do you know that you have greatness hidden within you? You have the ability to produce another human, and you have the ability to think, reason and be logical at the same time; damn, you are the most precious, intelligent being on earth! You don’t need to change yourself to assimilate with the society. You have as much right to stand on your own feet and follow your dreams as your male counterpart.

Our country lags way behind in terms of sex ratio and girl child awareness and education. If you are privileged to live in an educated family and work at your own will, then take a step forward and be an example to crores of women in the country who still don’t have a voice. Don’t let the naysayers trammel your energy. We can bring change, only by being the change ourselves. Be a woman, and be proud of it!

I believe all women have the knowledge rights to:

1) feel beautiful, and know how to enhance their own beauty

2) learn to have an elegant self confidence

3) date elegantly , find true love and marry a gentleman

4) be highly skilled in the feminine arts

5) have a happy family at every stage of her life

6) be comfortable wonderfully in a home

7) be free to express feminine traits like fear of silly things that warm a man's heart, or indulge in their natural behaviors of being caring, loving and nurturing

8) be indulged by gentlemanly behavior such as carrying of their heavy books, repairing the sink, drilling holes into the walls and be treated like a queen by a fine man

9) be protected, guarded, loved

10) learn how to draw out tender feelings of a man and have him be in love with you and you in him forever.

11) learn to understand a man, support him to his finest, appreciate him, most of all, admire him.

12) know what is an ideal woman, from a male's perspective

13) feel confident being in her relationship/marriage and how to have the best one on earth

14) knowledge in nurturing and bringing up her children.

15) to be a fine and gracious woman, bring inspiration to all around her!

I have this short poem for you...

God give us women

Women of such mold

Preferring ever honor unto gold

Women who wear their beauty as a flower,

Whose homey virtues are their richest dower.

Say you, "The age needs men!"

I say again, "God give us women

Lest we lack true men."

From the Desk of Esther Ijeoma Ogbuka.

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