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...THAT KIND OF WOMAN

A man went with his wife in their car to a fuel station, while they were buying the fuel, the man discovered that it was the wife's ex boyfriend that was attending to them, He then smiled and turned to his wife and said, "you would have ended up marrying that petrol attendant", but the wife smiled and said, *"if I had married him, He would have been the one sitting by the steering of the car"* *BOOM!!!* Now this woman understands the power of a woman, she gets it! She knows who she is and she knows that a genuine and Real woman has in her the capacity to produce much out of little. Please pay attention to this:*_ _There is a kind of woman a man will marry and He will never end up poor, not because she has millions, but because she has the true wealth within her...Wisdom. She has the ability to give life not just to the foetus in her womb but to the vision of her Man. She knows when to be economical and handle the family income with wisdom*Be that kind of w...

FORGET WHAT THE BEAUTY MAGAZINES AND FAKE CELEBRITIES PORTRAY AS BEAUTY.

I’m so tired of reading comments and messages of young ladies who keep telling themselves that they’re ugly because they don’t fit the predetermined standard of beauty that was established by Hollywood as well as the fashion and beauty industries. A prototype that is so difficult for us women to identify with, but that we’ll do anything and spend everything to try and live up to it. No! You’re not fat, you’re not ugly, you’re butt is perfect, your breasts are perfect, your skin is fine, your hair is lovely whether it’s curly or straight, short or long is just perfect. Your body is lovely, your nose is beautiful, those wrinkles on your face look great, YOU ARE ABSOLUTELY BEAUTIFUL AND PERFECT IN EVERY SINGLE WAY. Because… Everything that you are is what makes you extraordinary. It is so weird how everyone wants to stand out, but at the same time they all want to look the same . They follow fashion trends to look like other women, they get thick lips, tiny waist, big round butt, big ...

DON'T BE DECEIVED...

When you see something like this or some Dangerous athletic stunts and you start praying to tap into it then it is clear to me that what is working in you is strong! Hear me friends, I like to help you realize the much I can that, In this life if you must achieve somethings Then you must get your lazy self up and get to work. Miracles don't make things like what you see in that picture happen, It is practice, practice and more practice Don't be fooled by those who say Athletes don't need to train to win medals Students might as well pass exams without reading. Get up! And stop serving mediocrity lunch In this life my friends there are trade offs to make You want something, you must be willing to give up something for it. For those of you claiming the swimming unction on Michael Phelps Let me bring to your notice that, that guy spends 18hours in water training so it's not a shocker when he goes home with all the gold medals at the Olympics. C...

TEACHABILITY AND TALENT!

One of the paradoxes of life is that the things that initially made you successful and relevant are rarely the things that will keep you successful. You have to remain constantly open to new ideas ad be willing and ready to learn new skills. Iron rusts from disuse,stagnant water loses its purity and in cold weather it becomes frozen,in a similar pattern inaction saps the vigor and vibrancy of the mind. If you are a highly talented person,you may have a tough time with teachability. Why? Because talented people often think they know it all. And that robs them of their ability to continually expand their talents and skills. Teachability is not really a matter of mental ability and competence as it is about our disposition. In essence,it's about a desire to listen,learn and apply. It's the perpetual hunger to discover new territories and evolve to higher horizons and dimensions. The future does not belong to those who have learnt,but it belongs to those who c...

YOU CAN BE ALL AND EVEN MORE...

People say...Jack of all trade, Master of none, but I say...Jack of all trade, Master of some. Is it too much for a young lady to have a career, be a good homemaker, learn how to bake, sew, cook for public consumption, develop good business acumen, learn to write and pronounce words correctly, have a good fashion sense, run a Youth Foundation and be the best she can ever be not for her future husband but for herself and her self alone??? My people, without much ado, I unapologetically say....ITS NOT TOO MUCH. Our minds does not have an elastic limit neither can it reach a yield point. It can neither crack up completely nor develop a bunch of red nerves. It has the capacity to accommodate any input and make you Multidimensional so you can function without friction. There is a reason why we are made of bones and not dust. I tell you, once you discover that reason, you can be all you ever wanna be and even more. Esther ijeoma Ogbuka.

"BIG GIRL SYNDROME"

We live in a covetous world. Most times, we want to have what others have and look like others which simply mean we are patterning our lives to become whom we are not because the easiest thing to be is "Yourself". I remember 2012 my Final year in UNN, I needed a Laptop desperately and I wanted a brand new Laptop. Unfortunately, I didn't have enough cash. Father suggested a fairly used one but I bluntly refused insisting on buying one worth 90k or not buying any at all. "Ijeoma, why must you insist on a brand new laptop when you can get a fairly used which is even better than some of these new ones? I couldn't sputter a word of explanation, plausible enough to satiate and convince this great disciplinarian Father of mine. Some Years later, when I've earned enough to afford myself some luxuries, brand new laptop was totally off my list. I bought a fairly used one which serves me perfectly till date. This morning, I was just ruminating over some issues in p...

THE KIND OF MAN A LADY SHOULD NOT MARRY.

There are men and there are over grown babies that claim they are men. Men, which one are you? Are you the type that will come into a ladies life and shatter her dreams instead of helping her achieve her dreams? Are you the type that that will not inspire your woman instead you make her expire? Are you the type that sees nothing wrong in beating your wife all in the name of correction?or you embarrass her in front of friends and relations just to prove you are the man of the house? Are you the type that isn't proud of your wife, you don't take her out, you kill her self confidence, you disrespect her by collecting numbers from every girl you see on the street and you allow them call you at odd hours. Are you that will take care of your own Children when wifey isn't around and you see it as a favour you did for her? Your own Children...Are you the type that sees house chores as a woman's responsibility, no matter how tired she is, you can never help her out? Are y...

HER GREETINGS BECAME HER SAVIOUR.

A lady worked at a meat distribution factory. One day, when she finished with her work schedule, she went into the meat cold room (Freezer) to inspect something, but in a moment of misfortune, the door closed and she was locked inside with no help in sight. Although she screamed and knocked with all her might, her cries went unheard as no one could hear her. Most of the workers had already gone, and outside the cold room it's impossible to hear what was going on inside. Five hours later, whilst she was at the verge of death, the security guard of the factory eventually opened the door. She was miraculously saved from dying that day. When she later asked the security guard how he had come to open the door, which wasn't his usual work routine, this was his explanation: "I've been working in this factory for 35 years. Hundreds of workers come in and out every day, but you're one of the few who greet me in the morning and say goodbye to me every evening when leaving a...

'Why Our Top Pastors are Failing in Marriage' .

Relationship expert Praise Fowowe explains Relationship expert, Praise Fowowe, who is a self confessed sex addict turned relationship and sex counselor, in this incisive piece gave reasons why the marriages of some top pastors are packing up. Find his thought provoking piece below 1. A man of God is not God, he is a man: Unfortunately, we treat our men of God as if they are spirits who don't live in human body. What do we expect when we saddle them with our numerous issues. Unfortunately, many are not wise to say no to church members whose lives will continue if they drop dead. Church members have academic, financial, and even marital problems, they go to the pastor as if the man is built to solve every problem and in our quest to prove that we are superstars, we also fail to embrace the use of professionals who are trained in these things because of our hidden fear of respect. What stops a man of God who knows his marriage is in danger to take a back seat and allow a church memb...

DISCIPLINE IS THE GREATEST.

Anoiting is not a big deal, talent is nothing to boost about, gifts doesn't warrant success, the fact that you sing and bring down heaven on earth or you are so prolific in writing, skilful in homiletics, proficient in rhetorics and speak with oracular certitude does not mean you'll go far in life. In all these, you're not the best. There are many more gifted, talented, skilful in those same giftings. To some, God gave a talent, to some, he gave two, three, five etc. Many are so multidimensional with no elastic limit. In all these, there is one thing you shouldn't do without... DISCIPLINE. God cannot make you discipline, you inculcate it yourself. Your ocean of anointing doesn't make you discipline, your speaking in tongues doesn't make you discipline, your being a Minister doesn't make you discipline. Discipline is something you strive for all by yourself. Anointing without discipline brings shame and crisis. Discipline should be our watchword. Es...

YOUR SKIN, YOUR TRUE IDENTITY .

I chose to begin this way... Black- destitute of light; devoid of colour; enveloped in darkness, hence utterly dismal or gloomy; as the future looked black; soiled with dirt; foul; sullen; hostile; foully or outrageously wicked; as black cruelty; indicating disgrace, dishonour etc White- colour of pure snow; reflecting all the rays of spectrum; opposite of black; free from spot or blemish; innocent; pure; without evil intent; harmless; honest; square-dealing; honourable… This is copied from the famous scene of Malcolm X (1992) where young Malcolm, during his time in prison is made to read the definitions of these two words as written in a dictionary. What i wonder is, how much are these definitions of two words, still valid in a world of 7 billion inhabitants. Truth be told, we come in all kinds of shades available. Yet only the lighter skin gets prized and is seen as the ideal(isn't that true?). We do not question ‘why’, because it is our own mind-set to be blamed, but...

TWO WEEKS TO HER WEDDING

The hall was very quiet, so quiet that the silence reverberated loudly. Everyone around knew things had gone really bad, they could feel it, could sense it and even almost taste it. Yet, they didn't know what was the matter between these two. Alan was church brother any Christian sister would want to be with for the rest of her life, so good to the point that some sisters use him as a point of contact for their future husbands. He was an homely person, loved by everyone, fears God, hard worker, he has this statue to die for and truly, he's in money. He's an usher at the church and an assistant to the parish pastor. Sister Patricia is another God sent in her own way. She's always been seen in church as the standard of Christian sisterhood. Always modestly dressed, she's great in the kitchen, leader of the Evangelism unit at church, quiet in Spirit and loved by everyone. The whole church was happy to hear the announcement of their engagement which was soon foll...

WOMEN: WE ARE AMAZING.

WOMEN: WE ARE AMAZING. With blurred lines of society today, I write about my discovery of being a  woman. Although we are all born with it intrinsically, it is a art that can be crafted and refined with knowledge. Womanhood is something special and is a storehouse of amazing powers. However, most of us women do not acknowledge this great energy within us, firstly because we are ignorant about it and secondly because we are trapped in a society with numerous stereotypes, for instance, women can’t drive, women are not productive at work, women are weak, women talk a lot of nonsense, women are supposed to cook, women are supposed to understand their husbands and compromise or adjust. All of these external stigmas impede women from unleashing their true potential. But let me tell you one thing very frankly, being a woman is not about doing house chores, it is not about getting married and it is certainly not about producing children. A successful woman is one who can build a ...

How Lola brought charm TO HER HUSBAND'S HOUSE.

When Emeka broke the news to his parents that he planned to marry a Yoruba lady, they told him that he was a joker. That would never happen, they said flatly. Was there a scarcity of nubile damsels in Nnewi and its environs or in Anambra State and the entire Igboland that their son would travel across many rivers and many states to marry a Yoruba girl from Ijebu-Ode? Or, had the girl bewitched Emeka with “otumokpo” from Ijebu-Ode? She would not succeed, they concluded. Never! Weeks after that, nothing was heard about the issue again. They assumed that the case had been closed. Emeka had come to his senses, they concluded. But had he? Two months later, like a bad dream, Emeka brought up the issue of this Ijebu girl again! This time, his tone was firm. Despite the threats of the parents, he was not cowed. He was resolute to the point of obstinacy. Even the tears of his mother did not move him. His parents concluded their son was indeed under a spell. When it became obvious, aft...

YOU'RE NOT A BIOLOGICAL ACCIDENT.

DON'T DIE TRYING TO PLEASE A WOMAN( Things a man should never do to please a girlfriend).

Most men act illogical when they are really in love and this has cost them a great deal. I don't blame them because they were beclouded by oxytocins and other love hormones. It is not bad to please a woman but over doing it makes one stupid. As a man, you must be smart enough to read in between the lines to know what’s favorable and what’s not. I am not saying you shouldn’t be romantic, it is a good thing to be romantic but not to the detriment of yourself and you should know that, just because something might be done in the name of love does not make it the right thing to do and these are the few you should try as much as possible to avoid or never be tempted to do for a woman, except you have something to gain from her too .The things you should not do to please your girlfriend are: 1. STEAL FOR HER: Obviously, we all know where this will end you and by the time you will be back, someone might have taken your place. Never allow anything to push you to steal in order to please y...

WINNING IN THIS GAME CALLED"RELATIONSHIP".

Several years back, my criticism of this work would have started from the title given to this write-up, specifically, the idea of calling Relationship “a game” is something that I classified as disrespectful to use in the description of human feelings. But today, I chose to use this word to emphasize the importance of planning, strategy, decision-making and critical thinking in the running and management of this great human-can’t-do-without. I’ve some friends claim that LOVE is a game as well, but I’m yet to agree to that, because neither do I agree with their school of thought of Love matters nor any of the feelings fit in the place of a game. This, I believe make you wonder what a game is. The Concise Oxford English Dictionary describes game in all of this ways; an activity engaged in for amusement; a form of competitive activity or sport played according to rules; a complete episode or period of play, ending in a final result; informal a type of activity or business regarded as...

KEEP YOUR DREAMS AND VISIONS TO YOURSELF.

Many dreams, visions, ambition, goals have been truncated untimely. Some visionaries could not fulfil their years on this geiod shaped planet simply because their vision and mission got to the ears of people who never want to see others achieve a vision they could envision. Friends, you don't need to announce your great dreams to the world. Many who announced their dreams to their friends, family, loved ones have lost their lives untimely. Joseph was ignorant of this and announced his dream to his family. In Genesis 37:5, "And Joseph dreamed a dream, and he told it his brethren and they hated him yet the more " (KJV). Where he got critisms from his brethren, he didn't learn his lesson by keeping his mouth shut. He went ahead in verse 10 to announce his second dream, "And he told it to his father, and to his brethren and his father rebuked him". Sometimes, telling people the vision you envision instigate jealousy, envy, and hatred in their hearts. Many wh...

AN INFECTION ANTIBIOTICS COULD NOT CURE.

Simon's Story: On the morning of April 16, 2004, Simon, a 15-month-old child who had been recovering from a cold, awoke very upset with a high fever. His parents took him to the emergency room where doctors ran the standard tests (chest x-ray, oxygen-level), and speculated that he could be asthmatic. He was discharged at 1:30 PM. Once home, Simon began vomiting, became cold to the touch, and his lips turned blue. His nostrils were also flaring, and he was breathing very heavily. His parents called an ambulance, and he was rushed to the hospital again. He was diagnosed with an infection and sent to the intensive care unit where he soon fell into a septic coma. The doctors could not diagnose Simon's infection, and all of the treatments they tried failed. On April 17, 2004, Simon was pronounced dead at 12:45 p.m. (less than 24 hours from the initial hospital visit), without a precise cause of death. Two months later, the autopsy confirmed that Simon died from "methicillin-res...

THE WIDOWER'S PAIN. (Part 1)

When he walked into his office for the first time as the new regional manager of Castro ventures, he was greeted with an avalanche of publicity as everyone in the office gave a standing ovation in respect to his new official position. Interpolated to his versatile nature is the fact he works with dexterity and has amazing people oriented skills. Most of his colleagues cavils at his excellence each time their firm holds their quarterly review meetings. The more repugnant his success becomes to them, the more encouraging their envy becomes to him. The exigencies of his job demands an unbeatable level of punctuality but he’s not deterred. Punctuality has been one virtue he holds in esteem even as a mere worker in his early years at Castro before this unique trait, consecutive for the last three years got him the promotion he never expected. With this glacial success hovering around him, he’s still an unhappy man. A man of grief and solitude who smile at the multitude of many but sink in ...

DON'T REMAIN AT A SPOT by Ijeoma Esther Ogbuka.

Many lived all through their lives without discovering who they are and suddenly get knocked off by the unexpected call of death. Death makes my heart grieve because life is too short to just live without purpose or making impact before one depart. God planted you in the world and not in the ground. The day you go to the ground is the end of the game. Unfortunately, one of the things we don’t usually see is the fact that we are not like trees. Trees are stagnant, always losing their freshness from age as their bark harden with each passing day. Trees lack ideas, they can’t think, they aren’t multidimensional in reasoning, worst of it all, THEY ARE MOTIONLESS. They lack the capacity to move from where they are to another location. No matter the circumstance around them, they simply can’t take a positive step forward. Despite how unfavourable the weather is nor the climate change, they can’t uproot their adventitious roots. Oh! What a boring life for helpless trees. I bless God who pla...

SAGGING BREAST…Causes, prevention and why both men and women hate it.

  We have been running a series on feminine health to make women understand more about their body system and how stuffs work. Breast sagging is an experience faced by most ladies. Some no longer have confidence in their body because their breast could not win the fight against gravity. Sagging breasts can seriously weaken women’s self-esteem making them feel less attractive to the opposite sex. Breasts have no muscles, but consist of fat, connective tissues and mammary glands, so they require constant care in order to stay well-shaped. Breasts usually start sagging after 40, but in many cases it starts even earlier. Sagging breasts are not only caused by age and pregnancy. Factors such as these put the esteem of most women to jeopardy. If you're a woman who grew up playing with Barbie dolls, you may have spotted a difference between the fashion doll's pert chest and the lower-hanging breasts of mothers, grandmothers, teachers, and other women you saw around you. The girls…...